Navigating Digital Misunderstandings

Social Media MisunderstandingsNavigating the digital landscape can be challenging. At some point, we’ve all said something that wasn’t received the way it was intended. The digital world seems to magnify these unintentional missteps. Social media, while beneficial, undoubtedly leaves a void as it pertains to authentic relational connections. I’m convinced that it’s nearly impossible to really “get to know” someone on a digital platform. I think most of us would agree that until we can sit down, look a person in the eye, and hear his or her heart, it’s really difficult to say we actually “know” them. Many times someone has said, “I see you’re friends with ‘so and so’ on Facebook, how do you know them?” Then I have to explain that ‘so and so’ and I are only connected on social media, and that I don’t actually know them personally.

Undoubtedly, communication that lacks relational equity will more often be misunderstood than relationships that exist in the “real world.” Developing relational equity happens when we invest in people over a period of time. It is very difficult to cultivate a deep sense of respect in a relationship that lacks intimacy on some level. On social media, I’ve often been misunderstood. I’m certain that many of you know what that’s like. Therefore, this is an attempt to strengthen relationships by offering more insight.

Recently, I shared that I have screenshots saved on my hard-drive and am working on a case study pertaining to the antagonistic spirit that often prevails in various online forums. Over the past couple of years, I’ve had an unusual amount of screenshots sent to me privately. Often the sender solicits my opinion regarding the “topic” captured in the image. This has been a way for me to continue to dialogue privately with people without being heavily involved in the larger group discussions.

At times, I too have captured conversations, but not with the intent of using them against anyone. I have a long history of taking copious notes during meetings and important discussions. As a denominational leader, it is important to be accurate and represent peoples’ words fairly. When something eyebrow raising appears online that is directed toward myself or another elder, I have often captured it just to make sure I do not later misrepresent what was said.

Moreover, some material forwarded to me has been horrible beyond words and I have been advised to retain a record in the event a legal investigation was deemed necessary (every leader should understand the gravity of these situations). Programs like Evernote have become commonplace for keeping track of digital interactions.

As to online disagreements and controversial matters appearing in Nazarene forums, I have never used this information to harm someone, nor have I placed it in the wrong hands. In fact, I’m not that serious about it; I just think it is interesting and I have learned a great deal from those with whom I disagree. With that said, I have checked references for people soliciting ministry engagement on the Kentucky District, especially if I identify suspicious online behavior.

Beyond this, I have filed information to establish a case study library of sorts. Being informed on the issues of our day and keeping my finger on the pulse of the denomination has helped me personally as a leader. Understanding surging theological shifts is something I feel every leader should be aware of. In that respect, names aren’t important; I would conceal a person’s identity if that material were referenced in conversation or writing.

My focus is on the renewal of the Kentucky District where we are having success planting new churches and revitalizing existing ones. I am primarily responsible for the pastors that I serve and their development as leaders. Creating case studies has helped me better lead the Kentucky District by identifying movements within the denomination that are bearing fruit. I have no interest in policing forums and building files against leaders from other Nazarene districts; it just isn’t something I think about, nor is it my responsibility.

I am convinced that we cannot be fruitful for the Kingdom of God and play a game of online “gotcha,” besides I don’t know who has time for that game. Sowing seeds of discord and mistrust will not help us win a single person to Jesus. As such, I am resolved to believe the best and give people the benefit of the doubt. I would ask the same of you. Unless someone becomes overly antagonistic I’m willing to walk together for the sake of advancing the cause of Christ.

I appreciate your taking the time to follow my feed and read my blog. I am a very transparent person, my life is an open book, I know of no other way to live. Thank you for letting me be me, and helping me identify areas of improvement. I really do believe we are better together.

 

 

1 Comment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s